You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
