Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Randomize
