just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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