Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
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