I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
