He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize