Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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