Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
you inspire me to be a worse person
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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