Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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