Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
