Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Randomize
