so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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