TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize
