Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
