the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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