I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize