STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
