If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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