i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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