I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
