Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
