dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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