You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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