I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
