And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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