Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
