Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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