i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
kristin has been a bad kristin
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
