Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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