Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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