Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Randomize
