I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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