I cut my penus on the lid.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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