I just made out with a guy for $7.
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize