I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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