dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize