somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
smell my finger.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
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