Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Randomize
