he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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