Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
