I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Randomize
