we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
