More tranny stories later!
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
It was confusing and full of hummus
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Randomize
