If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
