she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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