I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Randomize
