He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
