Are we in a gay sports bar?
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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