I queefed so loud it echoed.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize
