are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
love makes seman taste better
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Drake has all the answers
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
